For 41 years I have gone with a very natural hair "look" that was originally popularized by coconuts.

Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information which is how I got a good job in journalism.

European toilet paper is made from the same material that Americans use for roofing, which is why Europeans tend to remain standing throughout soccer matches.

Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.

The question is: What can we, as citizens, do to reform our tax system? As you know, under our three-branch system of government, the tax laws are created by: Satan. But he works through the Congress, so that's where we must focus our efforts.

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.

The objective is not so much to walk your dog, as it is to empty him.