For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.

I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.

If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will. If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%? In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

This year, U.S. airlineswill carry a record 143 million passengers, who will be in the air for 382 million hours, during which they will be fed an estimated total of four peanuts.

I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.

A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.