If the security personnel do their job properly, they just might cause you to miss your plane, thereby possibly saving your life.

The basic Roman ruin design is a pile of rocks with a little plaque saying "Roman Ruins" and a group of tourists frowning at it and wishing they were back at the hotel bar.

If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Today's beauty ideal, strictly enforced by the media, is a person with the same level of body fat as a paper clip.

Sometimes you panic and find yourself emitting remarks so profoundly inane that you would be embarrassed to say them to your dog. Your dog would look at you and think to itself, 'I may lick myself in public, but I'd never say anything as stupid as that.'

The United States tried, by depressing the clutch of diplomacy and downshifting the gearshift lever of rhetoric, to remain neutral, but it became increasingly obvious that the nation was going to get into a war, especially since it was almost 1812.