I have found that the only thing that does bring you happiness is doing something good for somebody who is incapable of doing it for themselves.
David LettermanA lot of issues were on the ballots. In New York City there was Proposition 14. That would put a ceiling on the number of late-night talk shows. And California passed Proposition 21. That would change guacamole officially to guac.
David LettermanThe last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag
David LettermanToday Mitt Romney is 68 years old. It's kind of sad, a 68-year-old guy with no job, no future - wait a minute, that's me.
David Letterman