Do you remember the good ol' days when Congress was only unsafe if you were an intern.

Mayor de Blasio has legalized ferrets. Now you can legally own ferrets in New York City. I want to tell you something. If I want to see anymore beady-eyed little weasels, I'll just keep riding the subway.

Life experience is the best teacher.

Last night we had Bill Clinton, the former president. Security was as tight as Governor Christie's yoga pants.

President Obama is in China. Today he visited the kids who make our cellphones.

Rick Perry is now saying he thinks that Barack Obama's birth certificate is fake. I think Perry may have faked his driver's license.

President Obama went to India, South Korea, then Japan. He's going to keep travelling until he finds his birth certificate.