After a few months in my parents' basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations.
David SedarisI meet people at book signings. My record now, for signing, is ten and a half hours in one sitting.
David SedarisUsually, if I think something is really funny, it doesn't get any reaction whatsoever.
David SedarisEinstein wrote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. That said, is it crazier to repeatedly throw yourself against a window, or to repeatedly open that window, believing the creatures that are throwing themselves against it might come into your house, take a look around, and leave with no hard feelings?
David Sedaris