What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny.

I like Jesus, I mean, I think he was a good guy.

Why hate someone for the color of their skin when there are much better reasons to hate them?

I'm pretty much a chocolate guy. I'm up for any type of chocolate. Any chocolate.

Once people start to think they've wasted parts of their life, or they're wasting their life as they speak, that means there's going to be great dramatic and comedic tension.

I'm not saying being a comedian is brain surgery, but it is definitely - it's like being a carpenter. You learn how to make tables and chairs. You have to have the right tools, and you have to know how to put the thing together, right?

I will not bond. I will not share. I refuse to nurture.