I always wanted to live in a haunted house.

In the main, ghosts are said to be forlorn and generally miserable, if not downright depressed. The jolly ghost is rare.

I don't think anyone ever gets over the surprise of how differently one audience's reaction is from another.

If I were running a campaign, I'd urge taking the mountain of money reportedly squandered on pizza, coffee and bagels and spending it more wisely - on a talented young comedy writer.

I haven't ever found any great writing on that wonderful and often unappreciated art form, the insult.

Commercials are not the only exposure that obesity gets on TV. It is by no means a rarity on the wonderful Judge Judy's show when both plaintiff and accused all but literally fill the screen.

It's a tribute to the human brain that anyone is able to function out there on television in a talk situation that is entirely artificial.