My whole act is off the top of my head.

I would describe myself as a guy that's very normal but has the tendency to rib people, but never in a mean-spirited way.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

Famous people are deceptive. Deep down, they're just regular people. Like Larry King. We've been friends for forty years. He's one of the few guys I know who's really famous. One minute he's talking to the president on his cell phone, and then the next minute he's saying to me, Do you think we ought to give the waiter another dollar?

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

I've never been mean-spirited, in my opinion. I never did anything below the belt.

People think being in your seventies means sitting around in a chair with a blanket over your legs, drooling.