On being told of the death of former President Calvin Coolidge: How could they tell?

... if this world were anything near what it should be there would be no more need of a Book Week than there would be a of a Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.

Salary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart.

Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? A: You can't hear an enzyme.

If I had a shiny gun I could have a world of fun Speeding bullets through the brains Of the folks that cause me pains :)

Newton's Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.

Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.