Benchley and I had an office in the old Life magazine that was so tiny, if it were an inch smaller it would have been adultery.

Sometimes I think I'll give up trying, and just go completely Russian and sit on a stove and moan all day.

I find her anecdotes more efficacious than sheep-counting, rain on a tin roof, or alanol tablets.... you will find me and Morpheus, off in a corner, necking.

Well, there are always those who cannot distinguish between glitter and glamour . . . the glamour of Isadora Duncan came from her great, torn, bewildered, foolhardy soul.

All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were all right. You don't catch horses going around looking like people, do you?

It turns out that, at social gatherings, as a source of entertainment, conviviality, and good fun, I rank somewhere between a sprig of parsley and a single ice-skate.

There is entirely too much charm around, and something must be done to stop it.