If you ever go to Las Vegas, and you will, just go for a few days. I was there recently for seven days, seven days in Vegas. After I blew all my money on gambling and prostitution, I had six days to kill.

I used to make love to Green Day's music. But 9 minutes? I'm not Superman.

A talking dog is not the answer. That's not a way to convince people not to smoke pot. If animals started talking to me, I would up my pot consumption just to make that happen.

Marijuana: why forget something tomorrow when you can forget it today?

I just broke up with my girlfriend because I caught her lying. Under another man.

Einstein used science to get laid. That guy is a genius. I've been using money.

In terms of my lungs, pot smoking is not like cigarette smoking. It doesn't affect the lungs as quickly, or as much over time. If I stopped pot smoking today, my lungs could heal probably 100 percent in a few years.