Even if you are 18, my advice to you is: plan for your future.

I made some jokes about weed, got some laughs, made some more jokes, got some more laughs; next thing you know, I'm telling a lot of jokes about it.

Big deal... the only cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero legs.

I grew up in San Diego, so it wasn't hard to move to L.A. to get into show business, but I did the standard thing of just moving without much money and just seeing if I could make it work.

There's a lust to get on TV.

Rappers should be forced to rhyme in their acceptance speeches.

Why would any woman agree to be on a show called Bridezillas? It's not like men would agree to be on Douchegroom.