Everyone wants to look good in photographs, even us trolls who tell jokes.

I was immediately into all the great movie comedians - Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, Richard Pryor, Gene Wilder. Everything those guys had anything to do with, from I don't know how young. Super young.

Smoking pot makes people talk for long periods of time, for instance, so people who advocate pot won't shut the hell up about it.

I enjoy a lot of stuff. That's why I pursued a career in show business, because I enjoy watching everything as much or more than making it. I'm just a big TV and movie junkie from when I was a kid. Fortunately, it worked out.

I used to make love to Green Day's music. But 9 minutes? I'm not Superman.

We don't want any pot-smoking vaginas because that's disgusting. And I saw it once in Indonesia, and I've never been able to get it out of my head.

Stand-up is a very scary, very solitary profession, but you have to experience it to figure out if it's right for you.