To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.

The seat received him in a loose and distant kind of way, like an aunt who disapproves of the last fifteen years of your life and will therefore furnish you with a basic sherry, but refuses to catch your eye.

Anything invented before your fifteenth birthday is the order of nature. That's how it should be. Anything invented between your th and th birthday is new and exciting, and you might get a career there. Anything invented after that day, however, is against nature and should be prohibited.

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.

The light was only just visible - except of course that there was no one to see, no witnesses, not this time, but it was nevertheless a light.

Bistromathics itself is simply a revolutionary new way of understanding the behavior of numbers. Just as Einstein observed that space was not an absolute but depended on the observer's movement in space, and that time was not an absolute, but depended on the observer's movement in time, so it is now realized that numbers are not absolute, but depend on the observer's movement in restaurants.

Funny, how just when you think life can’t possibly get any worse it suddenly does.