New York is a theme park for people with IQs over 108.

Make your goals big and broad enough so that they never become answered prayers and boomerang to curse you.

Handmade presents are scary because they reveal that you have too much free time.

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public.

Beyond a certain age, sincerity ceases to feel pornographic.

We decided that the French could never write user-friendly software because they're so rude.

Flying dreams mean that you're doing the right thing with your life.