You’re not going to learn anything if you’re not prepared to go flat, so I’m very happy to go flat.

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

Its not easy being a man you know. I had to get dressed today… and there are other pressures.

Wow this place is really big isn't it? They must do proper stuff here, like opera and all that...shite.

I have no qualifications to do anything else and there weren't any formal application forms you had to fill in for stand-up, so I thought I'd give that a twist.

I quite fancy the 1940s. I like the trams and the trousers.

Have I had therapy? I went to a yoga class once.