You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them.

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic.

I'm actually about as famous as a fourth division footballer from the 70s.

Love in all its forms is very difficult ... to express. It changes, obviously. If you’re young, and you’re romantically in love with somebody, and often if you’ve just met somebody, its crazy! It’s completely overwhelming. You can’t think of anything else. You just want to climb inside the other person and live under their pancreas. And then it mellows, somewhat... to the point where you can barely look at them... without feeling a mild distaste

The measure of a conversation is how much mutual recognition there is in it; how much shared there is in it. If you're talking about what's in your own head, or without thought to what people looking and listening will feel, you might as well be in a room talking to yourself.

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

Its not easy being a man you know. I had to get dressed today… and there are other pressures.