Some have said that I can accept inadequacies in my players but not in umpires. That completely misses the point. I can't tolerate anyone's mistake.

A manager's job is simple. For one hundred sixty-two games you try not to screw up all that smart stuff your organization did last December.

I think the National League has better biorhythms in July.

The Chinese tell time by 'The Year of the Horse' or 'The Year of the Dragon.' I tell time by 'The Year of the Back' and 'The Year of the Elbow.' This year it's 'The Year of the Ulnar Nerve.' Someone once asked me if I had any physical incapacities of my own. 'Sure I do,' I said. 'One big one - Jim Palmer.'

Don't worry, the fans don't start booing until July.

The only thing that matters is what happens on the little hump out in the middle of the field.

I gave (pitcher) Mike Cuellar more chances than I gave my first wife.