Over the past 50 years Bob Hope employed 88 joke writers who supplied him with more than one million gags, and he still couldn't make me laugh.

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly! Ha, ha!

The white man gets all the best catchphrases!

I don't think there's ever been someone with as much presence as Elvis Presley, I mean if he walked into a room I think everyone would be looking at only him. Even when he was dying and through all that when you looked at him it seemed all put together. It fascinates me.

My life is nothing like the Daddy Day Care life. Me around the house is nothing like the Daddy Day Care dad.

Growing up, I liked all the stuff that everyone else was listening to, like Motown, but the biggest group of all was The Beatles.

How can you do the moonwalk and ask a woman to dance? Hey baby lets dance... cya later!