I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that.

You know how you always expect someone to think the same as you and then your like, really shocked when they don't? Like when it's a cold day and you turn to the person next to you and say, 'Its so cold, aren't you cold?' and then they say 'no.' It's kinda like, 'what, are you a communist?'

I admire people who know they can't sing. There are so many people out there who can't sing, but they think they can, so they sing a lot.

I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but look at me, I'm a huge celebrity.

When life gives you lemons....they could really be oranges.

A circus! 100 clowns of injustice have climbed out of the tiny clown car of this court room.

The song 'If I Had a Hammer' is geared toward people who don't have a hammer. Maybe before I had a hammer I thought I'd hammer in the morning and hammer in the evening. But once you get a hammer, you find you don't really hammer as much as you thought you would.