The sadness from reading letters that you know you can't help because it's a person who's in extremis and their problems are not soluble by an advice column.

My inbox [showed me] how much pain there is in the world. I appreciated hearing from people, but it was hard to know I couldn't do anything.

People often recommend, "Why do you ask?" as a good conversation stopper. But that really doesn't end the conversation, it just leaves the other person sputtering for a response. I like, "You'll be the first to know.".

Children need adult men in their lives.

Sure, people talk about all kinds of stuff at the office, but surely everyone has better things to do than sound like they're auditioning for Fox News.

I do feel haunted by some of the letters and the suffering people have endured. But I keep in mind that the people who write to me know that I am a journalist and an on-line advice columnist, not a social service professional.

I can't imagine anything that would signal more clearly that life goes on and joy can follow tragedy than your having a much wanted child.