When you've come face-to-face with the dark side of the school yard, life doesn't hold many surprises.

Artemis felt like he was six again and caught hacking the school computers trying to make the test questions harder

The craft's occupants clutched their armrests, and more than one of them closed their eyes. But not Artemis. He couldn't. There was something morbidly fascinating about flying into an uncharted tunnel at a reckless speed with only a kleptomaniac dwarf's word for what lay at the other end.

I have a lovely office at the back of my house; it's an old stable and you can see right out to the countryside on one side and into the house on the other side.

The two of them went down in a heap, with not even a turkey to break their fall.

...This is the only way. I will not allow humans or fairies to die when I might have prevented it.” Butler would not give up. “Listen to yourself. You sound like a... like a good guy! There’s nothing in this for you.

There is always a use for everything, Victor had told him. Even pain.