Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.
Eoin ColferWe get an apartment together, and after a whirlwind courtship you marry my sister and honeymoon in Vegas.
Eoin ColferEither that boy is the sanest creature on Earth, he thought, or he is so disturbed that our tests cannot even begin to scratch the surface.
Eoin ColferIf it looks like a Dwarf, and it smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf or a latrine wearing dungerees.
Eoin ColferLet's save some time here. I grow weary of your clumsy bluffs. In the case of an abduction, the LEP will send a crack Retrieval team to get back what has been lost.. You have done so. Excuse me while I titter. Crack team? Honestly. A Cub-Scout patrol armed with water pistols could have defeated them.
Eoin Colfer