People who get married because they're in love make a ridiculous mistake. It makes much more sense to marry your best friend. You like your best friend more than anyone you're ever going to be in love with. You dont choose your best friend because they have a cute nose.

I don't care if New York avoided bankruptcy by substituting tourism for the garment business.

Frenchman: Germans with good food.

I think one manifestation of integrity is holding a grudge. Saying no is a little different. Holding a grudge is the modern equivalent of having standards.

I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.

Your grandparents did not endure the indignities of a steerage journey to Ellis Island so that you could stand outside a discothèque and beg a wallpaper designer to take you in with him.

Polite conversation is rarely either.