I never took hallucinogenic drugs because I never wanted my consciousness expanded one unnecessary iota.

Money...buys privacy, silence. The less money you have, the noisier it is; the thinner your walls, the closer your neighbors.... The first thing you notice when you step into the house or apartment of a rich person is how quiet it is.

Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy

Being offended is a natural consequence of leaving the house.

In conversation you can use timing, a look, an inflection. But on the page all you have is commas, dashes, the amount of syllables in a word. When I write, I read everything out loud to get the right rhythm.

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

Inhabitants of underdeveloped nations and victims of natural disasters are the only people who have ever been happy to see soybeans.