Any artist who has that quality of timelessness has that quality because they tell the truth.

If food did not exist it would be well-nigh impossible to get certain types off the phone, as one would be unable to say, 'Look, I've got to run but let's have dinner sometime soon.'

How do you know if your child is a writer? Your obstetrician holds his stethoscope to your abdomen and only hears excuses.

Do not approach with anything even resembling assurance a restaurant that moves.

Now people need special costumes to ride bicycles. I mean, a helmet, what, are you an astronaut??

I woke up at five o'clock in the morning with the whole first paragraph in my head. Now, this just shows what a slothful person I am: I tried to go back to sleep.

The good thing about being in someone else's apartment is it's so much easier to leave than it is to get someone out.