Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches eagerly awaiting Easter.

I never would start writing before midnight and I would finish at, like, seven in the morning.

There are two modes of transport in Los Angeles: car and ambulance. Visitors who wish to remain inconspicuous are advised to choose the latter

I just can't smile at people for money.

You can't go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.

Tolerance is really a better thing than understanding. Because it doesn't agitate against human nature.

The only appropriate response to the question, 'Can I be frank?' is, 'Yes, if I can be Barbara.