Selective ignorance, a cornerstone of child rearing. You don't put kids under surveillance: it might frighten you. Parents should sit tall in the saddle and look upon their troops with a noble and benevolent and extremely nearsighted gaze.

Sing your song; don't let the bastards get you down.

I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.

Every show is your last show. That's my philosophy.

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

In the end, all solutions are temporary.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor