Night to night, doing the clubs is a lot of fun too because you have a lot more freedom and you don't have to worry about swearing or going off the script or going long or going short. If you bomb, only a handful of people see it. On TV, a lot of people see it.

If you are 26 years old and you're waking up under Star Wars sheets... the Force is not with you.

My brother is a tax guy, and the way I look at it, it's like he's spending his life saving money for rich people. So I think making strangers laugh, at least having a creative component to your profession, is more manageable for me. I can live with that a lot easier.

I sometimes throw in a couple of swears just to keep the Christian right off my tail. I wouldn't want to be the tea party's go-to comedian.

Every cookie is a sugar cookie. A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

I think everything contributes to your creativity.

The popcorn button on the microwave is a miraculous invention. More miraculous than even the microwave itself.