Maybe a silver lining to growing old is being able to watch Usual Suspects for the first time, again.

The popcorn button on the microwave is a miraculous invention. More miraculous than even the microwave itself.

Ever drive by one of those things on the highway which tells you how fast you're going? I don't even pay attention to them anymore because I found a similar gadget in my dashboard... Some people slow down at those things... I don't slow down. I speed up and set the high score.

As a child I most closely identified with Charlie Browns teacher. Nobody listened.

No matter what time of year it's always funny when a person walks by me dressed in religious garb and I say Happy Halloween!

Say what you will about Gypsy women, but they are remarkable assessors of blues guitar talent.

Do you know what Bill Gates has to pull out of an old coat, to feel like I did with a $20 bill? First of all, the idea that Bill Gates has an old coat is preposterous. If he has an old coat, it's the coat Abe Lincoln was shot in and he wears it as a bathrobe - no underwear by the way. He lets his billionaire balls swing willy-nilly beneath the death cloak of the great emancipator. That's your 1%.