I feel like the government is more evil than most corporations.

There's this other world where all comedians want to do is make funny videos. Typically what's happened in the past is that a comedian gets a standup career and over the course of 20 years builds it up to the point where Comedy Central gives them a sketch show.

I don't want our culture diluted. We need to close the borders now and let everyone assimilate to a Western, white, English-speaking way of life.

I started noticing a lot of big companies are bored with ads; they feel sort of lost in the advertising world. They're not into magazines anymore.

One of the downsides of being special is that you feel out of place wherever you go.

"My only problem with women breastfeeding in public is they never wink back." It's kind of the perfect joke because it's a bait and switch.

I'm not a tough guy or a good fighter at all. [Boxing] is just a great way to work out that's not boring. It's also good for your mental health. If you have an Irish or Scottish last name you should definitely do it.