The longer I live, the more convinced am I that this planet is used by other planets as a lunatic asylum.

Security, the chief pretense of civilization, cannot exist where the worst of dangers, the danger of poverty, hangs over everyone's head.

The more reasonable a student was in mathematics, the more unreasonable she was in the affairs of real life, concerning which fewtrustworthy postulates have yet been ascertained.

Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world.

If any religion had a chance of ruling over England, nay Europe within the next hundred years, it could be Islam.

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

Hell is a place where you have nothing to do but amuse yourself.