I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

If all the economists were laid end to end, they'd never reach a conclusion.

I tell you that as long as I can conceive something better than myself I cannot be easy unless I am striving to bring it into existence or clearing the way for it.

The apparent multiplication of gods is bewildering at the first glance, but you soon discover that they are the same GOD. There is always one uttermost God who defies personification. This makes Hinduism the most tolerant religion in the world, because its one transcendent God includes all possible gods. In fact Hinduism is so elastic and so subtle that the most profound Methodist, and crudest idolater, are equally at home with it.

People who are hard, grasping and always ready to take advantage of their neighbors become very rich.

What is the matter with the rich is Uselessness.

This planet is obviously being used as an insane asylum by other planets.