I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

I've posed nude for a photographer in the manner of Rodin's Thinker, but I merely looked constipated.

The world was to Shakespeare a great stage of fools on which he was utterly bewildered. His pregnant observations of life are not coordinated into any philosophy.

You see things; and you say, ‘Why?’ But I dream things that never were; and I say, ‘Why not?

Nothing is more dangerous than a poor doctor: not even a poor employer or a poor landlord.

Civilization is a disease produced by the practice of building societies with rotten material.

During the last considerable epidemic at the turn of the century, I was a member of the Health Committee of London Borough Council, and I learned how the credit of vaccination is kept up statistically by diagnosing all the revaccinated cases (of smallpox) as pustular eczema, varioloid or what not---except smallpox.