Hell is a place where you have nothing to do but amuse yourself.

To endure the pain of living, we all drug ourselves more or less with gin, with literature, with superstitions, with romance, with idealism, political, sentimental, and moral, with every possible preparation of that universal hashish: imagination.

I am the most spontaneous speaker in the world because every word, every gesture, and every retort has been carefully rehearsed.

Don't waste time collecting other people's autographs; rather devote it to making your own autograph worth collecting.

What is any respectable girl brought up to do but to catch some rich man's fancy and get the benefit of his money by marrying him?--as if a marriage ceremony could make any difference in the right or wrong of the thing!

Beware of the man who does not return your blow: he neither forgives you nor allows you to forgive yourself.

If the English can survive their food, they can survive anything.