My main reason for adopting literature as a profession was that, as the author is never seen by his clients, he need not dress respectably.

We know there is intention and purpose in the universe, because there is intention and purpose in us.

I'm only a beer teetotaler, not a champagne teetotaler; I don't like beer.

Patriotism is a word which always commemorates a robbery.

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel, but not in the kitchen.

God help England if she had no Scots to think for her.

Criminals do not die by the hands of the law. They die by the hands of other men.