War does not decide who is right but who is left.

I was convinced that Ceylon is the cradle of the human race because everybody there looks an original. All other nations are obviously mass produced.

A man ought to be able to be fond of his wife without making a fool of himself about her.

Bible worship, though at its best it may achieve sublimity by keeping its head in the skies, may also make itself both ridiculousand dangerous by having its feet off the ground.

Money enables us to get what we want instead of what other people think we want.

People always get tired of one another. I grow tired of myself whenever I am left alone for ten minutes, and I am certain that I am fonder of myself than anyone can be of another person.

Not everybody is strong enough to endure life without an anesthetic. Drink probably averts more gross crime than it causes.