Am reserving two tickets for you for my premiere. Come and bring a friend - if you have one. Telegram inviting Winston Churchill to opening night of Pygmalion. Churchill wired back: Impossible to be present for the first performance. Will attend the second - if there is one.

The notion that disarmament can put a stop to war is contradicted by the nearest dogfight.

What is the matter with universities is that the students are school children, whereas it is of the very essence of university education that they should be adults.

The things most people want to know about are usually none of their business.

Consistency is the enemy of enterprise, just as symmetry is the enemy of art.

Only fools repeat the same things over and over, expecting to obtain different results.

The faults of the burglar are the qualities of the financier.