What the world calls originality is only an unaccustomed method of tickling it.

Of the three official objects of our prison system: vengeance, deterrence, and reformation of the criminal, only one is achieved; and that is the one which is nakedly abominable.

I assume that to prevent illness in later life, you should never have been born at all.

I appeal to the chemists to discover a humane gas that will kill instantly and painlessly. In short- a gentlemanly gas deadly by all means, but humane, not cruel.

Life on board a pleasure steamer violates every moral and physical condition of healthy life except fresh air. . . . It is a guzzling, lounging, gambling, dog's life. The only alternative to excitement is irritability.

Words are only postage stamps delivering the object for you to unwrap

When God created man and woman, he did not take a patent. That's why any imbecile has been able to do so ever since.