The dramatic critic who is without prejudice is on the plane with the general who does not believe in taking human life.

The triumph of sugar over diabetes.

Whenever a man encounters a woman in a mood he doesn't understand, he wants to know if she's tired.

The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth.

A life spent in constant labor is a life wasted, save a man be such a fool as to regard a fulsome obituary notice as ample reward.

Common sense, in so far as it exists, is all for the bourgeoisie. Nonsense is the privilege of the aristocracy. The worries of the world are for the common people.

One does not go to the theater to see life and nature; one goes to see the particular way in which life and nature happen to look to a cultivated, imaginative and entertaining man who happens, in turn, to be a playwright.