Life is great and golf has been one of the great parts of it for me.

I spend a lot of time alone and my wife understands that I need to be alone. I enjoy being alone. But I'm never lonely.

if you make waffles, throw out the first one.

I think we all feel the same things most of the time, we just don't know how to put it into words. When I'm on stage, I say it. The truth makes people laugh.

As long as you're a tax deduction, you'll always be safe in my house.

I'm not afraid to take on somebody or say something that somebody will find offensive because unfortunately in comedy, you can't say anything really good without offending somebody.

Sometimes when you win, you think you're going to get everything to go your way.