Essentially, the Tea Party are the Hell's Angels, but with sun visors instead of switch blades. They push macaroni instead of meth. Mess with the Tea Party and they'll put your dog in an American flag sweater on a hot day.

When immigrants go into the worse neighborhood and they fix it up, they should become citizens.

Legal gun ownership always prevails over the emotionalism of the gun control movement.

The great thing about being rich is, you can embrace practices that kill the poor - that's what socialism does.

The inevitability of abortion. But I refuse to accept the amoral consequences that are even far worse than that, which is harvesting them because we decided that as an adult society, we can use children to make our lives better, if you seek the reverse.

The metric system was designed to get people to enter charity runs.Do you think you would go run a 3.1 mile race? No, but if somebody says, hey, 5 km. You go, 5km sounds pretty impressive.

Republicans do actually care about health care. They just don't care about government-run health care.