Republicans are systematically and deliberately trying to stop millions of American citizens from voting. What part of democracy are they afraid of? I call on Republicans at all levels of government, with all manner of ambition, to stop fear mongering about a phantom epidemic of election fraud. I'm calling for universal, automatic voter registration, every citizen in every state in the union.

Some things get better with age. And then there's Madonna.

Fact is, the desperate desire to be cool has skewed our culture toward nihilism, carelessness, and ineptitude. It is now cool to be an idiot. A jackass. It's cool to be a failure, as long as your failure is the basis for a reality show.

Delayed gratification is the one thing we ignore these days. And if you delay it, it becomes more pleasurable later in life.

People ask me what I am politically and I've previously offered this equation: I became a conservative by being around liberals. And I became a libertarian after being around conservatives.

The longer I live, the more I'm convinced the world is just one big high school, with the cool kids always targeting the uncool.

ObamaCare is to health care as a fart is to an elevator.