There is, it appears, a conspiracy of scientists afoot. Their purpose is to break down religion, propagate immorality, and so reduce mankind to the level of brutes. They are the sworn and sinister agents of Beelzebub, who yearns to conquer the world, and has his eye especially upon Tennessee.]

Government is actually the worst failure of civilized man.

In any combat between a rogue and a fool the sympathy of mankind is always with the rogue.

The true function of art is to criticize, embellish and edit nature… the artist is a sort of impassioned proof-reader, blue penciling the bad spelling of God.

The older I get the more I admire and crave competence, just simple competence, in any field from adultery to zoology.

A man always blames the woman who fools him. In the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark.

Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in their readiness to doubt.