Horse is fine. I'll ride a horse.

I'd love for someone to ask me about comedic technique and choices.

It's always fun when you see different comics at different weights or with different hair.

Another stupid thing I believed for a long time was that pizza was supposed to be said peed-za.

Who controls the images? Ultimately, we don't control the images. This is the minimum we're allowed to ask for: we don't get to control most of the media. We fight to have some say in the ways we're represented. At the bare minimum, don't insult us in person. That's all we ask! Let us at least be able to function freely in the world.

If I was just allowed to talk and handle the whole thing by myself without the audience interrupting with laughter, the show would be much more interesting. Think about all the time we waste by waiting for them to finish their noise, you know?

Horse is fine. I'll ride a horse.