I remember I was in music class, I was a senior in high school, and my music teacher was like, "You should be a stand-up comic, you could imitate anyone.

The most important thing as a comic and a creator is to have a robust standpoint.

My music teacher told me that she didn't even know why I was going to college - I should be a stand-up.

In my day we used to have pray to run into an ex looking great, but now you just post a selfie in your underwear.

My dad always said to go for my hobby and used to commend me for my excellent judgement so i try to do the similar for my children.

Lobster is not going to be as tasty with ice tea unless that ice tea is from Long Island.

God did not put you on this earth simplest to be any person's mom.