I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met.

When a place advertises itself as 'World Famous,' you may be sure it isn't.

We (San Francisco) have football weather during baseball season, and baseball weather during football season.

The only thing wrong with immortality is that it tends to go on forever.

Martinis are like breasts, one isn't enough, and three is too many.

A city is where you can sign a petition, boo the chief justice, fish off a pier, gaze at a hippopotamus, buy a flower at the corner, or get a good hamburger or a bad girl at 4 A.M. A city is where sirens make white streaks of sound in the sky and foghorns speak in dark grays. San Francisco is such a city.

I sometimes worry about my short attention span, but not for long.