A good column is one that sells paper. It doesn't matter how beautifully it is written and how much you admire the author... if it doesn't sell any papers, it's not a good column. It's a terrible yardstick to use, but in the newspaper business, that's the whole thing.

A good column is one that sells paper. It doesn't matter how beautifully it is written and how much you admire the author... if it doesn't sell any papers, it's not a good column. It's a terrible yardstick to use, but in the newspaper business, that's the whole thing.

We (San Francisco) have football weather during baseball season, and baseball weather during football season.

Isn't it nice that people who prefer Los Angeles to San Francisco live there?

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met.

I hope I go to Heaven, and when I do, I'm going to do what every San Franciscan does when he gets there. He looks around and says, 'It ain't bad, but it ain't San Francisco.'

San Franciscans have a bond of self-satisfaction bordering on smugness.