Remember Tupperware? That was the toughest stuff ever. Why can't they make a phone out of Tupperware?

I’m trying to be the Jay-Z of comedy one day. I don’t know if there’s any comedy moguls out there, but I would love to be the first comedy mogul.

You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing people overlook. And take a shower, take a bath every day.

Sometimes, when you get a girl pregnant, you blame the condom. His condom broke that night.

It's not even race; it's a certain type of person that gets 'Pootie Tang.

Curb Your Enthusiasm set me up so perfectly. That was one of my favorite shows before I got on it. That started a whole different level of a story for me. I didn't know how to process it until after I got on the show and realized what the purpose of it was.

I could never live with you; not 'cause I'm racist or nothing. It's just 'cause as a black man in America, I need to have someone I can come home and complain about white people to. And that just don't work with my white wife.