I'd rather be the king of kids, than the prince of fools.

There's something about a divorce in that even if your parents still love you, the fact that they can't live with each other makes you feel there's something wrong with you.

I'm an aspiring writer. I hate that phrase. You're either a writer or you're not.

There were times when I thought I got a bit more punishment than was coming to me, but I don't regret a minute of it now. Each of us must be tempered in some fire. Nobody had more to do with choosing the fire that tempered me than myself, and instead of finding fault with the fire I give thanks that I had the metal to take the temper and hold it.

I feel as if you're saying that DJ is not a real job.

You only have to go hardcore humiliation on the first film. On the subsequent sequels, you can coast.

I always feel bad for people getting married and spending upwards of a hundred thousand dollars. It just seems so absurd to me.